Self-Help : The Dance of Anger A Woman's Guide to Changing the Patterns of Intimate Relationships
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Manufacturer: Harper Paperbacks
Release Date: 2005-05-03
Availability: Usually ships in 24 hours
List Price: $14.99
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- ISBN13: 9780060741044
- Condition: New
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 The Dance of Anger - Harriet Lerner, PhD
Reading this book and an applying its tools and principles changed the direction of my life almost immediately. It's an easy read - about an uneasy topic that affects everyone. HIGHLY RECOMMENDED!!!
The Dance of Anger
Harriet Lerner's books are one of the best, easy to read and understand help books that I have read to take a new look at one's most intimate relationships. I ordered one for each of my grown children and for my sister, so as to allow their relationships to develop in a balanced direction.
A cornerstone book.
I first stumbled into this book in 1992/3. Since then, it has been one of THE books I bring me with wherever I've lived --I find that across so many contexts, cultures and situations it provides useful, practical and respectful advice and thought EVERY time. One of my favorite quotes she's said over the years --attributed to a colleague --is "speak up speak up speak up...the only person you'll scare off, is your future ex husband". This could refer any potential future ex-whatever (wife, colleague, friend, etc) I just ordered a new copy, because my old one is so highlighted, dog eared and faded to the point of distraction, this is how often I've used and read it. If you are looking for insight on how to productively recognize, respect and respond to your own internal signals of anger that something is not working right, get this book. One hard part is respecting the fact that once we live in a more centered and self expressive way --by expressing our core truths--others may not accept these things or may not choose to engage with what our truth is. In other words, they may leave. Its true, the letting go part is very very hard and this fear of loss has often prevented me from speaking up clearly. And this is exactly one of Dr Lerners points --that generally speaking, women are often held back through internalized socialized messages of 'dont get angry because others won't like you" (and this is bad, of course) and adhering to these messages is a very effective way to keep things calm and 'other focused' for women. And this is not a victim based, finger pointing idea --its simply the way many societies are organized and she makes the good points that there are many many positive aspects to being very concerned about others and the benefits of compassion. The trouble is when is comes at too high a cost of our own well being, which is what generates anger. I use this book in my professional teamwork consultancies and nearly constantly in my own life relationships. A real gem, one that we can all relate to, any time, anywhere.
Dance with Anger review
Very happy with this book. It has been a great help in my journey to understand not only my own anger but others in my family and some of the issues we have been dealing with. If you are looking for something to help you understand your anger and relationships this is a GREAT book.
Dance of Anger - book
I feel this is a good book for any woman dealing with anger in a variety of different relationship patterns. It helps to put a name to your emotions and your reaction to them, break free of repetitive destructive cycles, and release harbored animosity and pain.
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